Friday, August 15, 2014

Bats really are from the depths of...well, you know.

Last night, I decided to go against my first rule in life: NEVER EXERT MYSELF. I went for a walk after dinner. More like a stroll. As I was innocently walking back up my driveway, I suddenly screamed like I was being kidnapped. True story. A bat was crawling up my driveway on his nasty little wings.

As I refused to walk past it, or let anyone else do so, we all stood there and stared at it. My brother had the great idea to poke at it with his cane. Of course, it chose that exact moment to flap it's wings wide open and my brother took a nice little tumble after jumping like a little Mexican bean!

We all ran inside and slammed the door. As we watched from the window, it slowly crept up to my house. I was FREAKING. OUT.

I sent my Large Child to see what it was doing and get it away from the house. He poked at it with a stick and it HISSED AT HIM! So gross. I was still screaming like a little girl.

Finally, concerned it would get into the house and kill us all, I went outside and started spraying the crap out of it with Lysol. One can never be too careful. Determining all germs must be gone by now, I started spraying it with the hose while it hissed at me. I thought I was going to die.

Jared, fed up with my nonsense, came out of the house, AT LAST, and carried it away with a shovel. I have no idea where to, but I don't want to know.

After that experience, I have decided that the Batman franchise will never see another dollar of mine again!!!!!!!!! (Good timing anyway. Christian Bale is gone.)

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